Pesto Salmon

This has got to be the most ridiculously easy way to cook delicious salmon. Prep time: 2 minutes. Sit around and do nothing cook time: 20 minutes. Dishes dirtied: 1 knife and a cutting board. I will be placing it in my clutch recipe file. I stole it from http://kalynskitchen.blogspot.com/. It's a pretty fantastic South Beach Diet blog.

• 2 salmon filets
• 4 Tbl pesto (make your own for extra points, but I just used a jar)
• 1 medium tomato, sliced thick- I recommend splurging for the good quality on the vine type
• 1 tsp olive oil
• lemon juice from 1/2 lemon
• aluminum foil

Preheat the oven to 450. Squirt some lemon juice over the fish and let it sit for 5-10 minutes. Alton Brown told me that when a fish dies, it releases chemicals that produce that fishy smell. These chemicals happen to be basic, so squirting something acidic on the fish neutralizes that acid and fixes that fishy smell.
Take about 3 feet of foil and fold it in half. Drizzle that olive oil on it and position the fish on top, squiggling it around to make sure the bottom is covered. Spread the pesto on top of each piece, place the tomato slices on top, and fold the foil to make a pretty little package. Put it in the oven for 15-20 minutes (depending on how thick the fish is) and serve.

-Jackie Nemunaitis

THE Stir Fry

If I've cooked dinner for you lately, there's a 1 in 2 chance that it's been a stir fry. If I was... let's say, sobriety challeneged when I cooked that meal, there's a 3 in 4 chance that it was a stir fry. This is that meal that I can cook with my eyes closed, one hand behind my back, at 2 AM. It also happens to be healthy and tasty. As the name "Stir Fry" implies, you can put anything in this in terms of veggies and proteins, but I'll give the standard recipe that I make most often. I'll be honest, this is going to be some terrible instruction, mainly because I can never keep track of how long it takes to do things like stir fry mushrooms- you just cook them until they're done. That's that. So use common sense, I suppose, if you're idiotic enough to try this after that introduction. It really is super easy.

These amounts will make 4 servings, easily, and it reheats fantastically.

The most important thing you'll need is a packet of Sun Bird General Tso's Chicken Seasoning Mix. It's cheating, I know, but that's sort've the point. Look for it in your Asian food aisle. They have a bunch of flavors, but after trying all of them, this is by far the best.

Additionally...

• soy sauce, about 1/4 c
• 2 tbl brown sugar (omit if low carbing it- it's not necessary)
• 1 Tbl rice vinegar, or water if you don't feel like investing in this
• 1/2 package firm tofu, cut into 1/4 inch cubes
• 2 Tbl olive oil. This is a total estimate. I have no idea how much oil I use... just use enough to keep the food from sticking
• 1 small onion, chopped
• what, like, a handful of frozen, already cooked shrimp
• 5 oz mushrooms, sliced
• 4 cloves garlic, crushed and chopped
• 1/2 can bean sprouts
• 1 c frozen broccoli crowns (go ahead- spend the extra 50 cents for the crowns over the general, stems included broccoli- you deserve it)
• 2 eggs
• 1 c frozen cauliflower
• a dash of cayenne pepper if you like it hot
• 1/4 c peanuts
• 1/4 c green onions

Thaw the frozen stuff however you like. Obviously, you could buy everything fresh and cook it up, but if you're that ambitious, you probably shouldn't bother with this blog. Also, get your sauce ready to go. Mix the sauce packet, soy sauce, rice vinegar (or water), and brown sugar together and set aside.
Heat some oil in a nice big wok over medium high heat. A wok is actually pretty necessary for this. You're going to run out of room if you use a frying pan. Make sure the oil's hot, then add the tofu and onion. I like mine to get pretty crispy, so to accomplish that you have to let the tofu and onions sit in the oil for a minute or so, then turn them with a spatula. If you've never worked with tofu before, it takes practice to cook it how you like it, but if you don't get it perfect, it's not a big deal. A stir fry is a really forgiving way to practice making tofu. When it starts to look a little brown, it's done- like a perfectly roasted marshmallow. After a few minutes with the tofu and onion cooking, add the mushroom, garlic, and cayenne pepper. You may have to add a little more oil here. After a few minutes, when the mushrooms are done to your liking, add the thawed broccoli, cauliflower, and shrimp. Push everything to the side of the wok and add the eggs, scrambling them with your spatula. Let the eggs cook until they're soft, as in not quite done, then mix everything in your wok. You can try the infamous flippy food thing, but you'll probably just make a mess. Now add the sauce and bean sprouts. Stir it all up. If the sauce seems liquidy, just let it cook off some of the water. Garnish each bowl with the green onions and peanuts.
-Jacklyn Nemunaitis

A BIG FAT ROAST CHICKEN

Oh, God, Roast Chicken. A food with so much importance to me that it warrants capitalization. With the singular exception of roast duck, this is without a doubt my favorite meal. It's the ultimate simple yet delicate, unpretentious yet classy, comfort food for one or impressive meal for a group. I've been working very hard at perfecting this dish, and I've pick up a few tricks that I think are worth sharing. In terms of prep work this is... considerably easier than pie. I'll try to tell you how to make the most simple sort of Roast Chicken, but once you get the basics down, there are endless modifications. If you're trying to save on fat and calories and avoiding the skin (which, damnit, probably makes a lot of sense considering how much fat and calories are in the skin... I won't tell you here. If you want to know, look it up yourself. Finding that out was the culinary equivalent of finding out there was no Santa Clause. I don't want to force that burden of truth on anyone) you should still cook the chicken with the skin on- it's critical for sealing in the flavor. Then just remove the skin after it's cooked. You don't add any calories this way, just seal in the juicy goodness.

You go and you get yourself:

1. 1 Chicken for Roasting, 2 1/2-3 1/2 lbs.****
2. 3 Tbl butter, softened- for 2 different purposes
3. 3 cloves garlic, chopped
4. 1/4 c chopped parsley
5. salt and pepper

**** This is important. Don't go for the cheapo chicken. It must say "for roasting" or "for baking." Also, you want it to be relatively small. This means the fat to meat ratio is right on, and your chicken will be plenty succulent. Pay no attention to the 6 lb beast in these pictures. It was all the store had, and I NEEDED Roast Chicken. NEEDED. I have few cravings stronger than my Roast Chicken craving.
Preheat oven to 450. Don't be afraid of the high temperature. It's completely normal.
Make that butter mix first- combo 2 Tbl of the butter, garlic, and parsley in a small bowl.
You want the chicken to be at room temperature when you start messing with it- this ensures that it will cook evenly. Take out all that crap on the inside. Now rinse your chicken inside and out and dry it with a paper towel, or several. You want it as dry as possible. This will help make the skin crispy and allow you to bake rather than steam your chicken. Only masochists like steamed chicken.
Place that chicken breast side up and separate the skin on the breast and thighs from the meat with your fingers. This makes a handy little pocket for you to cram that butter mixture in. Pull the legs together and tie them with a string. I don't really know what the purpose for this is other than to make the bird look pretty, in the traditional sense. I skip this step a lot. Season liberally all over with salt and pepper, using more on the thicker parts.
Put that last 1 Tbl of butter in a roasting pan and pop it in the oven just long enough to melt the butter. Now load the chicken into the pan and stick it in the oven. Leave it there for about 30-35 min. You're going to get antsy and want to check on it. Don't. You'll release the heat. After this time, take the chicken out and flip it using some tongs and whatever heavy machinery you've got lying around. Careful not to splash the hot juices all over yourself; spewing obscenities can cause a scene at dinner parties. Put the chicken back in the oven for another 10-15 minutes, then take it out and flip AGAIN! Flipping lets all the juices distribute to all the right places. Let the chicken cook in that oven for about another 10-15 minutes until it's done, for a total of 50-65 minutes. If you're feeling lucky, you can go with the pop-up timer that comes with it (in my personal experience, this has gotten the cooking time spot on, but it's also completely failed- use with caution) or stick a meat thermometer in the thickest part of the meat while the chicken is cooking- it should read 170 when done. Finally, when you pull it out, let your creation sit on the carving board for at least 15 minutes to let the juices set. This will be hard. It will smell freaking incredible. You can do it. It's worth it.

I made some roast veggies on the side in a separate pan- just chopped cauliflower, some big chunks of red onion, and about 10 cloves of chopped garlic (this is not an exaggeration- I really dig garlic). Tossed it with olive oil, salt, and pepper, and stuck it in the oven with the chicken for about 30 minutes, turning once. Why, Jackie, why didn't you just roast everything in the same pan as the chicken, you ask? Answer: I just don't like how oily the veggies get when they cook in the runoff from the chicken, especially since I plan on saving a lot of it for future eating. Re-heated oily veggies are super gross.
My belly is so full and satisfied. To my mother: Thank you for the quality eating habits. To everyone else: I really just wrote all this to make you super jealous. Bitches.

-Jacklyn Nemunaitis

Something Like Chicken Curry with a Cauliflower Puree

Does adding curry to something make it a curry? I'm really asking. I don't know. Anyway, this is another attempt to pull something creative out of whatever I have in my fridge. I've been craving curry for a while, but I couldn't imagine it could be any good without rice. In desperate times like these, you have to make sacrifices and compromises. I thought I'd try pairing curry with that infamous cauliflower puree that all low-carbers experiment with once in a while because someone told them it was supposed to be like mashed potatoes but really it tastes nothing like mashed potatoes. Lies! It certainly doesn't taste anything like rice, but it did the job- soaked up the sauce, balanced the heat, and was pretty light.

Something Like Chicken Curry

• 3 chicken breasts, boneless, skinless
• 1 med red onion, sliced
• 3/4 c fat free sour cream
• 1 1/2 Tbl lime juice
• 3 Tbl green curry paste *You could probably just use whatever curry spice you have lying around. I personally really dig green curry. You can find it in the Asian food aisle just about anywhere
• 4 sprigs mint, chopped fine
• olive oil
• salt/pepper
• a lil fresh parsley for garnish
• a few pinches cumin*
• a pinch cayenne pepper*

First, get the sauce ready. Stir together the sour cream, lime juice, green curry paste, and mint. Set aside for now.

Heat up the biggest flat bottom skillet you've got on med-high heat with about a Tbl of olive oil. When it's hot, add the onions. Sprinkle with salt, pepper, cumin, and cayenne pepper- these amounts are up to you and how much heat you want. Sautee until they're clear. In the mean time, pound down the chicken breasts until they're all one thickness, but don't destroy them. No need to get them super thin. Salt and pepper both sides. Reduce heat to medium. If your skillet is big enough, shove all the onions to one side, add another Tb of olive oil, and lay down the chicken flat. If your skillet isn't big enough, just take out the onions for now. Let the chicken fry for a couple minutes on both sides, so they're starting to brown. Reduce heat to low, but still simmering. Add the sauce and try to mix it in with the juices coming from the chicken a bit. Put the onions back into the pan and cover. Let that cook up for about 10 minutes. Take the lid off and let the sauce thicken a bit. This is really the key to this recipe. You need the sauce to be decently thick and creamy (of course don't overdo it and make your sauce all caky). This may mean taking the chicken out and setting it aside if it finishes cooking before the sauce is thick. It's worth the extra time. Serve on top of the cauliflower puree with plenty of sauce and onions. Top it off with the parsley.

Cauliflower Puree

You can probably get a more reliable recipe for this off any old low carb website, but I'll tell you how I do it, super easy style.

• 1 bag steamable cauliflower
• 1/4 c fat free sour cream
• 1/4 c fat free mayo
• 2 Tbl cooking sherry*
• salt/pepper to taste

Steam the cauliflower then combo everything in a food processor if you've got one, blender if you don't. If you go the blender route, add little bits of cauliflower at a time. It's kind of a pain in the neck getting this nice and smooth- you'll have to stir it a bit. Start on a low setting until everything's broken up, then switch to ultra super power and GO! until it's creamy.

If you want to be fancy you can roast some fresh cauliflower with garlic and olive oil and use that in your puree. I'd probably do that if I was making this as a stand alone side, but since it's just backdrop, I got all lazy.

Rasberry Mojito Jello

This was quite obviously one of those "what disaster can I make from the crap in my fridge that's about to go bad?" recipes. College students- you know what's up. It's times like these I'm glad blogs don't have editors. For 10 calories, 0 carbs, and a scavenger hunt through my fridge, this was a very nice little treat. It made my tongue all tingly. If you serve it to others, I'd recommend actually using a mint leaf as garnish. It helps get the mint scent across.

• 1 package instant rasberry sugar free jello (that's what I had in my cupboard- if I made this again, I'd definitly use lime jello)
• 1 cup water
• 1 cup soda water
• the juice from 1 lime
• about 4 sprigs of mint, chopped coarsely

Set the water to boil, then in a metal bowl put the jello and chopped mint. When your water's singing add it to the bowl and stir to dissolve the jello. Put a plate on top to cover and let it sit for another 3 minutes or so. My theory is that this lets the mint oil get into the jello without letting the jello set. I don't know if this really makes sense. Afterwards, send this mixture through a wire mesh strainer into another bowl. Add the soda water and lime juice. Pour it into serving containers and fridgerate. I thought it filled 3 wine glasses generously. I also made a fantastic mess, so if you have a bowl with a spout of some sort, I recommend using that. I think this is best eatin' when it's still soft set- after about 1 1/2 hours, depending on your fridge. I'm pretty psyched to make this into jello shots at the next appropriate gathering.

Pesto Stuffed Chicken Breast

This isn't exactly your "light summer chicken" recipe. It doesn't mess around. I ate mine with a simple side salad, and that's just what it needed. I also think it's not quite as bad for you as the ingredients list will make it sound- most of the fat cooks off when you bake it. Also, the low/no fat version of everything works fine. This recipe is surprisingly quick and easy, and produces very few dirty dishes, which is always nice. What you'll need:

• 2 chicken breasts, fat trimmed (A note about chicken breasts- I have always found that the most tender chicken I cook is from the frozen aisle. It's counter intuitive, but has never failed me).
• 1/3 c pesto (store bought or home made, if you're into that sort of thing)
• 1/3 c mozzarella cheese
• 1.5 tbl mayo
• 1/3 c Parmesan cheese, grated
• 2-3 cloves garlic, sliced* (I only recommend this if you share my boundless infatuation with garlic)

Preheat your oven to 375. You need to pound the chicken breasts flat. If you've never done this, just place one between 2 sheets of saran wrap and pound away with a kitchen mallet, or just something flat and heavy. Go ahead and release a little aggression. You want it as flat as possible without demolishing it- no more than 1/4 inch thick. Now mix the mozzarella, mayo, and pesto together. Spread this on the more raggedy side of the chicken, then roll it up. You may need a toothpick to hold it together, but this has never been an issue for me. Place the chicken in a baking dish, coated with cooking spray. Take that Parmesan and coat the chicken, pressing it in so it sticks. Top the chicken with the sliced garlic, if you're so daring. Put it in the oven for about 45 minutes, although you'll want to check on it around 40 minutes, and it might take a little longer. It all depends on how big the chicken breasts were that you purchased. You want the chicken to be firm to the touch. The garlic and cheese will be starting to brown. If you're not too concerned about calories, drizzle some of the cooked off sauce over the top.

Next time I make this, I think I'll add some chopped mushrooms to the filling. I think that would be a really nice touch.

Less a Recipe, More a Recommendation: Elvis Costello's Favorite Spinach Dip

My mom has always put this dip out at family gatherings or football games, and it's always a crowd pleaser. When I called to ask for the recipe, expecting it to be some magical secret passed down for generations, she just told me to buy a package of this:

It's all on the label, and is probably the only recipe that I follow to a tee. I won't bother reproducing the recipe here, because you're going to have to buy the soup mix, but it's essentially spinach, mayo, sour cream, water chestnuts, and whatever magic is contained in that packet. I used low calorie/low fat everything and couldn't tell a difference. It's especially delicious when served out of a loaf of pumpernickel. In the past I've had a lot of trouble finding whole loaves of pumpernickel that I can hollow out, and my expectations of success on this island (where "going clothes shopping" means a trip to Target and we don't exactly have Jewish bakeries on every corner) were low. Leave it to Wal-Mart to once again save my ass with their overload of variety. It's also great (and low-carb friendly) with raw broccoli and cauliflower.

Not the prettiest picture, but I was having a hard time sneaking one in before my brother dug in and got his greedy fingers all over my shot.

Another completely unrelated recommendation that is useless to any non-Galvestonites: the mahi-mahi at the fish market right now is amazing.